By Brian Lee
I’m one of those lucky enough to have a view of the Harbour from my house. It’s not a 180-degree panorama — more like a 12-degree porthole — but it’s just enough to watch boats. And I’ver noticed there might be even more boats than back in the day when scores of small car-toppers or runabouts would be heading out to chase salmon.
But they’re not that small anymore. There are plenty of gleaming white zodiacs scouting all the nooks their 50-foot motherships couldn’t reach.
Or kayaks ― the Skardon Islands regularily teem with the colourful pods, clustered around its beaches as if wondering what to name this uncharted discovery.
But it’s clear that size is winning out as the choice of the modern mariner and if it’s a true that a boat’s a hole in the ocean you pour money into then there’s still a lot of money out there to pour. We’re not Monaco yet but it seems the economic downturn missed a few folks.
Not only do many of these boats cost $1 million-plus to purchase, they burn upwards of $200 in fuel every hour. Many much more than that. I marvel at what these toys must cost their owners in fuel, moorage and upkeep.
Someone who’s travelled up Jervis Inlet regularily for many years told me recently he’s seen a huge drop in the speed of boats heading to Princess Louisa and pegs it to the cost of fuel.
It may explain the proliferation of sailboats — almost 50 per cent by my boat traffic estimates. But sailboats can be pretty pricey too and it sets me to thinking:
How could I ditch this pansy gig and pull a buck-fifty off every one of these gin palaces? I can’t afford to buy a marine pub in Garden Bay to have them come to me so I’ve racked my brain for a unique angle.
I thought of selling hot dogs and ice cream from my rowboat but decided that sounded kind of messy.
Mobile marine massage? Possibly.
Seafood sales? Nope, everybody already does that.
Maid service? Not for me.
I even thought of prostitution but I promised myself I’d never pimp again after what happened last time.
The truth is, the yachting crowd should offer a tantalizing business opportunity but I get stumped trying to figure out what it might be. They come here for the one thing they don’t already have and it’s free ― we call it the Harbour.
Their absolute self-sufficiency and contentedness leaves me with just one idea:
Piracy.